Life Lately & Reflections on Adult Friendships
February 2022 - Newsletter #10
Hi friends! Hope you’re hanging in there. 💛 This is officially the 10th (!) monthly-ish newsletter I’ve sent. I’m still playing around with the format, but basically, it’s a round-up of round-up of life things - what I'm enjoying, reading, learning, buying, doing, thinking about, and more. I’ve really enjoyed putting it together, and gotten great feedback from you, so thanks for being here + reading along! 🥰
Anyway, let’s get into it!
ADULT FRIENDSHIP REFLECTIONS
I’ve been thinking about adult friendships a lot lately. Friendship, of course, is something I've always valued, but honestly has been subject in heavy rotation in my mind since the early days of 2020. The friendships that feel like family, the friendships that . Some friendships have just fizzled out due to lack of proximity or change of life’s seasons. Some have ended abruptly and painfully. Some have started anew. Some have been around in through many phases of my life - high school, college, my 20s in San Francisco, since having kids, living in Nashville now.
I don’t think we give ourselves enough credit for maintaining friendships. I don’t think we give ourselves enough space to grieve friendships that have ended. I don’t think we spend enough time thinking about what being a good friend truly looks like. I don’t think we redefine what we need and want in friendships, especially as our lives shift and change and evolve. I don’t think we talk about the importance of friendship enough, especially compared to the cultural obsession with marriage and having kids.
Here’s a few thought-provoking, powerful articles, blurbs, posts, etc. I read about friendship recently that really resonated with me.
On Big Friendship: “Big Friendship can hold you when you’re worried that everything else is falling apart. It can be a space of validation when you feel alone in the world. It can provide the relief of feeling seen without having to explain yourself in too many words. And it offers the security of knowing that you won’t have to go through life’s inevitable challenges alone.” - via Big Friendship: How We Keep Each Other Close book
On friendship breakups: “In our society, we believe that once we are friends with someone that we should be friends ‘forever.’ The ending a friendship means we’ve failed, or something ‘bad’ happened between two people. It’s natural for friendships to end throughout our lives. There might not be a concrete reason (like a fight) or something we’ve done ‘wrong.’” - via @the.holistic.psychologist
On making new friendships midlife: “Making friends in midlife, while challenging, might also be a gift, a chance to enlarge one’s world and one’s self. It sometimes feels at 40 [or 30] as if our lives have assumed their final shape, entrenched as we so often are in our careers and cities and relationships. But to meet new people who see me as I am right now, not as who I used to be—is to acknowledge the growing that we all have left to do.” via The Atlantic
On adult friendship strain: “Life changes and challenges can impact our friendships in sometimes unexpected and even unwanted ways. [For example, parenthood, grief + loss, moving cities, job-related stress, mental health issues, differing political views]. Know that you are not alone if you’ve ever found it difficult to keep your friends close when navigating a big life transition.- via @miriamkirmayer
On the importance of good friends (and how hard it is to keep them): “And this is, mind you, how most friendships die: not in pyrotechnics, but a quiet, gray dissolve. It’s not that anything happens to either of you; it’s just that things stop happening between you. And so you drift. The unhappy truth of the matter is that it is normal for friendships to fade, even under the best of circumstances. The real aberration is keeping them….” - via The Atlantic
LIFE LATELY
I sent my last (January) newsletter on my birthday during our vacation to Belize! We had SUCH a wonderful, relaxing time and I’m so so grateful we got to go! Here’s my blog post recap and tons of photos from our time in the jungle and at the beach! 🌴👙☀️
We recently celebrated both Lucy and Winnie’s birthdays! 🎈🎉 They are exactly two years and three weeks apart, so we decided to host a joint birthday party this year! We hosted an Adopt-a-Puppy themed party and it was SO much fun. Here’s a blog post with all the party photos, more details about the decor, food, and activities, and more! 🐶🦴 I can’t believe I have a FOUR and TWO year old!
A little work update… I am officially an adjunct professor at the E.W. Scripps School of Journalism at Ohio University! It feels extra special to teach at the same place and within the same program I once graduated from. This has been a professional goal of mine for YEARS and it feels surreal that it’s actually my job. We’re officially six or so weeks into the semester and it’s been rewarding so far. The course I’m teaching is called “Graphics of Communication” so students are learning about design fundamentals, creating digital content for different channels/platforms, analyzing design materials, etc. Basically, I’m structuring the course with the main goal being that they each develop a stronger, more strategic eye for design.
I’m going on a girls trip THIS WEEKEND! 👯♀️ I’m meeting three of my best friends in Denver and I literally can’t think about anything else. I met them my freshman/sophomore years of college and all of us lived in San Francisco during our 20s together. On the topic of friendships above, these gals would fall into the ‘Big Friendship’ category and I’m so very grateful for them. Now, we’re spread out across the U.S./Canada and I’m just GIDDY to be together again! 💛
THINGS I LIKE!
The girls got the Toniesbox for Christmas and it’s been a huge hit! If you don’t know, Toniesbox is basically a screen-free, portable story time and music box where you can buy different ‘Tonies’ characters that play/read different things. The girls love swapping characters on the top (Elmo, Paw Patrol, Disney, etc.) and it keeps them happy and occupied in their room! 💛
After years of using a diaper bag backpack, I recently swapped to this Satchel Diaper Bag from Fawn Design (gifted). It is really so beautiful and has a ton of space inside for storing diapers, wipes, snacks, water bottles, and their little bags of on-the-go toys. I like that this feels more like a chic purse than a diaper bag, especially now that we don’t need to bring *as much* baby/kids stuff with us when we are out and about.
Realllllly digging these Zara jeans! They are high-waisted (a must for me), wide leg cropped jeans with v cute button detailing. They are comfortable, flattering, and I got so many compliments wearing them! 🤗
Here’s 7 IKEA Items We Own & Love! Most of these items we’ve had for many years now, and all of them we’ve been very happy with!
The girls finally have a little table + chair set! We borrowed a friend’s kids table + chairs for their birthday party and Lucy and Winnie LOVED having their own little area. When Lalo asked if they could send us their 'Play Kit’ (kids table + set of two chairs), I jumped at the opportunity! You can mix and match the colors of table/chairs, but I just went with the simple ‘Coconut’ color. The girls have loved having their own little area for their art projects and have used it every single day since it arrived. 🖍🎨
READING, COOKING, PLANNING
Reading (started/finished since last newsletter): Minor Feelings by Cathy Park Hong (really enjoyed this series of essays about her experience as an Asian American woman), Razorblade Tears by S.A. Cosby (crime story), The Wife Upstairs by Rachel Hawkins (this kept me on my toes!) When the Stars Go Dark by Paula McLain (crime/mystery), Night Music by Jojo Moyes (easy-to-read fiction story - I’ve always liked this author!), The Four Winds by Kristin Hannah (really enjoyed this story about a family’s journey to California during the 1930s Dust Bowl), No Cure for Being Human by Kate Bowler (remarkable, inspiring story of her cancer battle + self-help type)
Cooking: I’ve been craving Italian Wedding Soup lately, which is something I loved in my pre-vegetarian days in college. I decided to try my own version (based off of this recipe) with vegetarian meatballs and pesto and it was SO good. I’m making it again this week! Just about once a week I “make” nachos for dinner, which is basically just chips, veggies, soyrizo, guac, salsa and cheese. It’s EASY and always a hit with everyone. 🥑
Planning: some upcoming trips! Over the girls’ spring break in March, we are doing a family staycation at a hotel in Nashville, followed by a trip to a cabin iin the North Georgia Mountains. E and I are doing going to Mexico City for a friend’s birthday in May, hopefully to Morocco for my shop in June, and back to Mexico for a friend’s wedding in July! And, Lucy and I are hopefully going to NYC just us this spring/summer! We are also planning a larger international family trip for the fall, but haven’t gotten that far yet. 😆
Q&A (this is a new section of the newsletter where I answer questions I’ve gotten recently on Instagram)
Q: Have you shared more about how you started and run your blog?
A: I started my blog luckyandi.co in college (2009) and the name, content, and frequency of posting has really evolved over the years. I used to post daily, focused on self-love, encouragement, empowerment Tumblr quote type stuff. I’ve shared different things as my life has changed and evolved. Now I use it to share ‘longer form’ content - room tours, travel guides, longer personal reflections, roundups (ie 5 XYZ we own/love). Sometimes I have a lot of ideas and free time and share weekly and sometimes I go months without posting. I have a subcontractor who manages my personal Pinterest (focused on re-sharing/repurposing blog + IG content) and my work Pinterest for my textile shop. Outsourcing that work and investing in Pinterest has been hugely helpful for me to grow my blog traffic, drive sales to my shop, and led to more Pinterest and blog brand partnerships.
Q: Where is that necklace you always wear from?
A: I wear this gold initial necklace from Maya Brenner almost every day! I LOVE it. When I first got it, it just had the E and L initials (for Eric and Lucy) but after I had Winnie, I was able to mail it back to them and they added the W initial too! It really is such a meaningful piece of jewelry.
Q: Where do you shop for Lucy and Winnie’s clothes?
A: Zara, Hanna Andersson, Gap, H&M, Target, and many small shops! This blog post shares all of my favorite places to shop for kids and baby clothes/accessories, organized by category/type.
FROM MY CAMERA ROLL
CODES & DISCOUNTS
LUCKYANDI for 10% off everything in my Moroccan textile shop!
LUCKY20 for 20% super soft, comfy kids undies (UNDERS) made in Nashville
ANDI25 - Get 25% off Eizzy Baby - we love their collapsible silicone snack cups
LUCKYANDI- Get 10% Chelsea & West Pop-Up Play Tents
Get 20% off everything from Kitsch via this link
LUCKY10 for 10% off Little Colorado - we own the kids picnic table!
LUCKY5OFF for $5 off your first Vellabox candle subscription order
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